unrecovered: (Recovery One)
Agent Washington ([personal profile] unrecovered) wrote2017-02-01 11:36 am

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goddamngrenades: (Project Freelancer = Futility)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-04 10:27 am (UTC)(link)
"It never occurred to me as something to want until he leaned in and then instead of 'oh yeah that'd be fun' I panic." He's still panicking a little, really. A lot. He's got issues that he's aware of for the most part and nearly none of them are directly connected to his love life which is probably fortunate for both him and whoever gets caught up with him-

If it were anyone but Locus.

"I haven't wanted anyone in a real way since- well. I resigned myself to Carolina being dead." And then suddenly this muddling mess of could've, would've, might yet have and he- he knows his luck in this area and his luck is shit. He could break him. "What was that thing you said about social inequality RE you and the chief? I don't think he's ever...done this before. And I really shouldn't be anyone's first go around."
goddamngrenades: (so then we get shot)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-08 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
"...I don't know who you look at but while at one time, yeah, he knew how to do and he is slowly learning how to do again- Locus is still awkward as fuck. Words to explain shit do not come to him. We manfully ignore shit more often than not." And that- well. Probably has lulled Locus into the 'don't have to talk about shit' funk he's in that led to this moment. He's...dealing with changing gears in his head as to 'if this is gonna be a thing or not'.

It's a gearshift. Delta is only helping a little.
goddamngrenades: (I could live without)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-08 05:05 am (UTC)(link)
"I'm not qualified to help him process his trauma, I'm barely qualified to process mine." And that's a long road still coming. "He is traumatized. We don't talk about it because that's what YOU do with him. That's your thing."
goddamngrenades: (this has got to die)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-08 05:12 am (UTC)(link)
And this, here, is the crux of it. It's been too damn long. There's a way to have that talk and he just- it's been years. Fucking. Years. "I don't remember how!"
goddamngrenades: (Don't make me splain the thing)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-08 05:16 am (UTC)(link)
"It goes bad. It always goes bad and it is always my fault, I'm gonna fuck this up. I'm gonna fuck him up if I try to do- anything." He's terrible at this. How is it that Locus is somehow more on board with giving this a shot than him?

He doesn't know better.

"...for what it's worth, Delta agrees with you." Which is usually a sign that it's the right thing to do and he's just being too damn chickenshit.
goddamngrenades: (this has got to stop)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-08 05:27 am (UTC)(link)
"It'll break him if I fuck this up. He'll think it's his fault and it won't be-" He sighs, scrubbing a hand through his hair, hand combing all the way back to the nape of his neck where he presses down. What little grounding physical contact he can get with Delta? He'll take.

"...I'll think it over. He doesn't always get what I'm try'n to say when I'm try'n to say it."
goddamngrenades: (i'm lost)

[personal profile] goddamngrenades 2017-07-12 05:45 pm (UTC)(link)
"Yeah thanks for bringing that name up." He's not sulking. He's not. "Sam had issues before Felix, Felix compounded them, I am not gonna be the nail in that coffin. We can just-"

Just what?

Fuck.

"...I'm gonna need time to get my head around this. Probably gonna have to talk it over with the Doc on my own before I haul him in for that." A beat. "And just to drag up a closed topic- you could probably do the same with the Chief. Just. Say'n."